The Business of Being Real

All I hear about these days is how important it is to be your authentic self in business - how it’s crucial to show up as the one and only you each day. But how much is too much? Can we really be our unique selves in the workplace while maintaining a sense of professionalism, poise and decorum?

This is something I’ve struggled with my entire life. I tend to go into buddy mode in most situations. I want everyone (myself included) to feel comfortable, at ease and relaxed. It helps keep me calm, and I’d like to think it’s a more enjoyable experience for all.

But is this professional? Is it acceptable in a business setting? Is it too much?

When should you cross over from being your real self into acting as your business self? Are we all just acting at work? Are we performing the roles of CEO, business executive and the like, or are we actually those things?

I keep hearing that the best way to attract the type of clients and partners you want is to be yourself no matter what. Based on the Law of Attraction, like attracts like. Therefore, if I want to attract a client with a large marketing budget and an open mind to new ideas, I need to flex my big marketing muscles. I most likely need to give off a large sense of bravado, tout an extensive vocabulary and talk a big game.

This would not feel authentic to me, but it would absolutely give off a certain impression. If I remain true to who I am, folks will see someone who is deeply spiritual (some might say woo woo), obsessed with theater, books, film, art and dance and LOVES a good chat.

Is there space for someone to be their authentic self AND maintain a sense of professionalism? I’d like to think there is room for both to exist, but that means there are still two selves at play.

The older I get, the more I realize that things aren’t as black and white, as I had hoped. Most of life lies within the grey area — or as therapists like to say the “messy middle.” In this instance, it can work in our favor.

I can show up as my authentic self at work: unique, spirited, enthusiastic, professional, knowledgeable, dedicated, loyal, loving and FUN. I can be the marketing executive AND the CFO (Chief Fun Officer).

Maybe being professional doesn’t mean being less of ourselves — it means knowing which parts to lead with, and when.